The Banker

Submitted by an ILYP reader, who wrote that the following email came from "an aged Marlon Brando look-alike"

"I have my butterfly net in hand. You seem like a sweet down to earth woman. I am a powerful man in the banking industry and am lloking for a fiend to share with, to hold hands and tlak about our fynnt family stories and my life of adventure. I am a man of waelthand taste but usually don't tell anyone. It kind of spoils things sometimes. I am confident, not coky nor pretentious, usually get what I want. So are you coming voluntarily or do I need to sweep you off your feet. I'd rather save the charm for latter on. I am a weekend rider, weekday suit and time man in the banking industry.
and definitely not the biker type. I just like to ride. No tatoos or
piercings, suit and tie professsional, well educated, sincere and
low key, yet bold and assertive at the same time. Share your better qualities with me. I can change your like forever if the sparks fly."

then later that day, from the same guy...

Subject: can we talk?
"I'm a talker, not a chatter. I like to hear an intriguing womens voice.
Can you please call me tonight? I'm up until 12:00.

516-xxx-xxxx""

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